Fat Women and Fake Confidence

Am I the only one who is absolutely annoyed by all these fat women on myspace with nasty titty shots and headlines like, "Officially rated thick"? I mean, seriously... no one wants to see your flapjack fat-girl droopy-boobs. Or at least do us a favor and buy a wonderbra? And why is it that they all seem to be B-cups on a 300 pound body? Is this a new trend? Huge chicks with tiny tits? I mean really now... padded bras people! Water bras! Ever heard of them?

I think the most annoying part about it is that being fat myself, I know you don't TRULY love your body for what it is. I have accepted what I am, and I may be comfortable with myself, but I'm not going to falsely broadcast that I'm proud of what I've become. At least I have some excuses though- I'm pregnant with my 3rd child, I've had milk in my boobs for Christ's sake, and all I do is cook and clean and take care of kids all day. So yeah, I've let myself go a bit. But what about these 25 year old 300 pound nasties that have no excuse? Wait, they do... it's called MCDONALDS, BURGER KING, WENDYS... oh, let's not forget HARDEES. Avoid the drive-thru, ladies. It works wonders. I know from experience.

Officially rated thick? No, you're just a lazy fatass. You sit around, stuffing Hostess cupcakes into your mouth at your desk job (if you even have a job), then go home, throw on some low-cut top that's 5 sizes too small and about 2 gallons of makeup and take your myspace pics. Ah yes, always remember chin-up! We don't want to see how many chins you REALLY have.

Cute face, chubby waist? No, the cute face part doesn't exist. Maybe cute FACES, since you have enough there for at least two. And the chubby waist looks more like you swallowed a semi-truck tire. If you are proud of that, then I feel sorry for you. Nothing like being proud of the fact your ass is going to have a heartattack by age 40! Hurrah!

BBW? Big is right. Beautiful is debatable. And woman? Well, go get the broom so we can shove your gut out of the way to check for sure. Ugh. I just puked in my mouth a little bit.

This also brings me to all the fat women who try to squeeze into clothes from Abercrombie. STOP. PLEASE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. YOU ARE NOT A SIZE 14! Hell, you're not even a size 22! No one wants to see your love handles and spare tires. And wear shirts with sleeves for crying out loud. Arm jelly is NOT attractive, I don't care if it's 90 degrees out. And shorts? Anything above the calf should be outlawed for you... cellulite is not this season's fashion! Bleh. If this makes you as sick to your stomach as it makes me, avoid Wal-Mart at all costs.

And for those of you thinking, "Well, you're fat too," let's look at a few things here.

Yes, I am fat. But I also accomplished a weight-loss of 55 pounds before I got pregnant. That's quite an accomplishment, and I plan on doing the same once I have this baby.

Secondly, I don't broadcast my weight problem to the world.

Thirdly, my clothes fit.

So, as a fellow fat-person, I have every right to be disgusted by those who seem to ignore common decency. I should be able to go to the grocery store without tossing my cookies. As should anyone.

In closing, I think we all should stand together and fight for my right to hold in our lunch.

Who's with me?